Perfection

I think along with everything else in the world, even perfection is a state of mind. I went to a dance graduation last night. It was an Indian dance graduation - where the student has to perform a series of numbers - solo with a live orchestra. It usually ends up being a 3 to 4 hour event. Of course getting to this point takes years and years of practise and at the end of it all - it boils down to what happens on stage.

So, the dancer is practising, the teacher is practising, the singers are practising and all the other people come together to put a phenomenal show together. But a lot is happening back stage - the lights and sound coordination, the sound for the instruments, the makeup,the costume change, managing the show so that one item flows to the next and the coordination between the singers, the dancer and the drums and cymbals.

Now, a good student is one who has learnt all that the teacher has taught and is able to connect to the audience and take it to the next level and a good teacher is one who has imparted all the knowledge and taught her student how to handle the knowledge that is given. In the program yesterday I think both the teacher and the student met the mark of being good student and teacher because of how the dance was perceived. Perfection in dance is not just doing what you have been taught but when you go beyond that and transport the whole audience into another realm. In my humble opinion - the dancer was able to do that.

There were hitches, like in every program - but handling crisis in spite of everything is what makes the show go on. In the dancer's mind - it was not perfect, in the teachers mind - it did not come out the way it was planned - but at the end of the day - you look at - was it complete, did you connect to the audience, did you learn from the experience?

It is a hard pill to swallow when you have worked so hard and it does not come out the way you want it - but you learn that not everything is in your control - it teaches you humility. This experience may have far reaching effects to both the student and all the others around her.

There is a reason why everything happened the way it happened but we will never know, at least not now.

How you do one thing is how you do everything

If you have ever heard the adage 'how you do one thing is how you do everything' - you should know it is totally true.

I never realized it until someone mentioned that to me and I started to be conscious about it. How I approach a problem is how I think, is how I analyze, is how I keep my room, my bathroom, my office table, my kitchen counter, my house or the folders in my email or the directories on my computer or my purse.

Hee hee hee - if any of you know me you know you will find anything. But the way you keep stuff is a reflection of your state of mind. So if you have a million plans running through your head - you can be rest assured you have a number of half finished projects also around your house.

Now I never thought you could unlearn that messy way - but you can. Ask any engineer. There is a method to their madness. Every task is broken down into samller achievable tasks and analyzed and completed. No new task is started until the previous task is finished.

If you are the kind that needs small frequent meals you probably work on numerous projects for short periods of time. Your stamina can only keep you going for so long. But if you are the kind that needs 4 solid meals - you probably work on some heavy duty projects and your energy is sucked up by that.

It has to do with the kind of energy that surrounds you - the calm kind or the restless kind. Your personality dictates it - however in order to make the change you have to first recognize it. They say that after many years of marriage the spouses start to behave like each other - I guess as long as it is the good stuffit is fine.

I have to say that I find a less frenzied aura when things are kept where they should be, plans completed, beds made, counters wiped, documents filed and files organized. I just ahve to get used to it.

Reverse! Reverse!

When you were young your parents told you study hard, become good at what you do and then you will be known for your work and then people will respect you for that.

But now that does not apply. There is no reason that says that you have to be old by the time you get that knowledge. The same goes on the Internet. With the Internet making knowledge available at your fingertips - it is the passion that you have and expertise that you acquire that gives you respect.

You gain the respect first on the Internet because you make your self known first.
Only then you get power - the money comes last.

I can only say that it is a good thing - at least I don't have to wait until I am retired to get any respect or expertise.

How do you stay married for 10 years or more?

This was the question my teenager asked me over the phone. My first response was - why do you want to know? I had all sorts of scenarios going through my head. I was relieved to hear it was a part of sociology project. I told her to ask her dad.

However, her question was thought provoking. It made me start to think what has kept us going all these years. Most of the kids ask how can you stay with the same person for so long, I know I did when I was a kid. But now I realize how important is to have another person with you going through every event in your life.

I was curious to hear what he had to say about keeping a marriage together. He said it one sentence - similar values, children and companionship. it was the shortest interview with the most information. These are important factors - having similar values is the glue that holds it together, kids keep you busy early in the marriage and companionship is important so you don't die of boredom.

If anyone ever told you that marriage is a bed of roses - they are lying. No marriage is easy and you really have to work at it. It does not matter if you had an arranged marriage or a love marriage - you still got to work at it.

Don't take anything for granted and be happy whatever you do. Just my .02$.

Romance story come to life

Did you hear of the millionaire guy who was looking for a wife? His needs are very specific - she has to have brains, body and balance and has to be between 5'5 and 5'6.

Now I don't blame the guy- after all how can he distinguish whether she is after his millions or not right? In India we call it arranged marriage - of course we have a few more variables thrown in along with horoscopes. Here he has a marriage broker whom he is paying 50 grand! By the way in case you did not know - nobody knows what he looks like or his name.

I am not sure who would want to marry the guy - but I am sure there are a lot of takers. If this was a romance novel, she would need to get married to get out of some other kind of trouble and he would agree. Of course he is in it for life but he needs her to sign a prenuptial just to be on the safe side. She will agree as long as she gets to change her name and gets his protection.

In a matter of time, the villain shows up and tries and blackmails her. She tries to cover it up and fails. When she gets into trouble cause the blackmailer does not believe that she does not have the money, the hero shows up. She confesses, but the hero is hurt and lost trust - just as he was getting used to having her around and making him feel whole.

So she has to something totally out of character for her like - say that she can walk away so that he can get on with his life. And she does walk away, but they are both miserable and they finally get together and proclaim their love for each other and live happily ever after.

The End.

Interesting answers

The Miss USA pageant was held on Sunday. I am always interested to hear what the five finalists have to say when they are asked that final question. It seems to be the final straw that either makes or breaks them.

I never anticipated the backlash when Ms. California replied that she did not believe in gay marriages. Reports say that her answer cost her her that crown. However I have to applaud her for standing for her convictions. At the same time I wonder if that was the popular answer that everyone wanted to hear.

At the same time Ms. North Carolina said he does not approve of the government bailout - I have mixed feelings about it - I was totally opposed to the government giving the big banks the money, who ended up posting billion dollar profits and gave out million dollar bonuses. However, I am grateful that the government intervened and gave the automakers the loans - so that they can figure out a way to survive. I wonder if the answer she gave was the popular answer that made her the winner.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

As Aretha Franklin belted out in her song - I got to have just a little respect...

What is it about human nature that drives one to treat people without respect. It looks like if you treat me well, I treat you like dirt, however, if you treat me like dirt, I will treat you very well. Why is it that people never take each other at face value? Why do people see the worst in others?

Every person is good, there are no bad people, just bad circumstances. But in my observance of human nature I see that when one is nice to someone - they wonder why? They expect the worst. What is in it for you? - they ask. Husband or wife, brother or sister, teacher or student, friend to friend, employer and employee - it does not matter what the relationship - that question is always in the back of the mind - what is in it for you? Or on the other hand - walk all over them cause you think they are weak. Why? Is it human nature to want to be in control and control others?

The ancient texts say that what you receive is a reflection of what you project. Keeping that in mind, in order to gain the respect of those around you, you have to project the vibrations that will encourage the same feeling. Be confident, be true to who you are and what you want from life, have the courage of conviction to stand up for what you believe in. It is a hard concept to follow if you are not used to standing up for yourself.

Children watch adults and imitate them. Or children see the downside of not standing up for yourself and swear they will never be that way. If a child lives with kindness and consideration they learn respect. In this fast paced competitive world, I see more disrespect - whether it be towards parents, elders or teachers.

Are we as parents setting a good example for our children? Are we being kind and considerate towards others and their beliefs? Are we raising a generation that is respectful of their past, cherish the present and care about the future?

Are we?

Do you know how to build a car?

Do you know how to build a car? I don't think so. So why don't you leave that to the experts in Detroit. They have been doing it for a 100 years.

I never realized how passionate I would be about the auto industry until I saw the reaction of the rest of the country and the Congress. As we watched the congressional hearings I cringed in embarrassment as the senators lashed out at the Big 3 CEO's. I could feel the humiliation of every auto industry worker when the CEO's were referred to as beggars with tin cups arriving in personal jets. That was dumb - it did not really help their case.

However does anyone know how to build a car? Before that, I would like to ask - how many of those senators and congressmen drive American cars? Did you notice that while Obama's entourage was driving American, Senator McCain was driving a Toyota? All those senators who lashed out at the Big 3 were from southern states where Toyota and Honda have their plants. Everyone seems to be gung ho on allowing the Big 3 to go bankrupt.

Wake up people! You have already allowed all your manufacturing to be done by China or outside the US. Are you willing to become an impotent nation that has no manufacturing of their own? Have you forgotten or did you never learn of the industrial revolution and the role of Henry Ford in being instrumental in making this nation as a developed nation?

Now I am not saying that everything what they have done so far is right and there are definitely changes that need to be made - but in this present economy when the whole world's fate is dependent on how the US handles it - don't you think that we should be patriotic and support one our own so that we can come back as a leader?

Nobody seemed to have any trouble when the big banks failed and the government shoved billions of dollars down their throat, whether they wanted it or not. Hmm, maybe the senators didn't want their stocks to lose any value or being greedy is okay as long as it does not affect my portfolio. Hypocrisy at its ultimate, don't you think?