Injuries - the bane for runners

Little did I know that a little discomfort to my ankle would cause so much pain.

Being a dancer and training for the half marathon it is imperative that your legs especially your joints are well looked after. Maybe it was an old injury or maybe it was just stress - when my ankle started to hurt I just kept my foot up thinking it would go away.

But life does not stop because you are uncomfortable and the body learns to cope. So I was hobbling around by distributing my weight differently so the weight was not being put on the area that hurt. As a result other muscles in my leg started to hurt because of the difference in walking. Now I know how people who have polio learn to deal with the way their cope because of the distribution of the weight.

RICE - Rest Ice Compression Elevation is the key - but to be honest I only did the rest and elevation. There are other home remedies that help like soaking in salt water that definitely helps.

But as a result I have lost a week of training - which means I have to start from scratch again. The important thing is not to hurry up the healing process because the injury can become worse. So bottom line - enjoy the time off to heal and then start again with renewed vigor.

The Art of Saying No

Have you noticed that saying NO is probably one of the most difficult words to say. Surprising, considering the first word that most 2 year olds thrive on is the word - you guessed it - NO. So why then is it so hard for an adult, who is probably extremely busy and has enough things going on in their life have such a hard time to say NO?

I think it has has to do with one of two things - either you don't want to deal with the hassle of negotiating and so it is easier to say yes or it is your personality and you really don't know how to say No.

I know of many women who have a hard time saying no (including yours truly) but that is because it is the nature of the person, you are used to doing things for others at the expense of sacrificing your own things. You are always afraid of hurting the other person's feelings. However you are going through major anxiety because you would rather be doing something else.

Maybe it is a woman thing - but I know many men who have the same issue. Some husbands are careful how they word their choice for fear of upsetting their wives, they need the wife to hang around and look after them (good choice!). And then there are some men who really don't have any problems saying no when a no is required.

But there is an art to saying No. When softening the blow with an explanation seems to work in a corporate setting. The dangerous part is when you don't say anything - because usually saying nothing usually is taken as agreement. It is always better to say something to the effect of - I still need to think about it - instead of keeping quiet.

Sometimes it is better to say No and be done with it - that way there is no question of procrastinating the decision making and you can move on - however there are some things that you really do need to think about before you say No.

However when my teenager starts a conversation with Can I ask you something - my response is usually - NO. Considering how many of those conversations start like that I am getting really good at saying NO.

Permission

It must be a control thing. Asking for permission and granting it. I know as a child you have to ask permission for everything. Not that you will be granted permission but it is good manners to ask. As you grow older - it is almost like second nature - where you ask permission but you don't expect to be denied permission - it is just courtesy.

Then you grow up (or if you read my last post - you age chronologically) and other people ask your permission. And it feels great. Wow! The power you have over some one else's decision making.

But herein lies the issue - when someone asks you what to do and you give an answer - you expect them to do as you say. That does not always happen. Sometimes they ask you because they want to know what you think. If you expect them to do as you tell them, then you are foolish.

But there is another aspect to asking permission. When you ask someone else's permission to want what you want you are giving away power. You cannot decide on a choice based on someone else's decision. It took me a long time to figure that one out. You make a decision and stick with it. Sure you can ask people, and they will tell you if they are for or against it, but that does not mean they are giving their permission.

You cannot get someone else's permission to justify what you want to do and then complain when things don't go your way. Asking permission to want what you want is an act of cowardice - which means you are not willing to take ownership of the consequences of your actions.

It is about the courage of conviction because even if the going gets tough - the tough keep going.

Growing up

Age has nothing to do with wisdom. Neither does growing up. Some are late bloomers and some learn young. If you are within the norm - it is expected however if you are an outlier, you are looked upon with reverence or laughed at - it depends on who is doing the laughing or the revering.

The hardest part about growing up is realizing that there are some things you cannot change - be it the society or nature and you just have to deal with it. After all the only person you can change is yourself. Once you recognize that, a lot of things become easier to deal with in life.

There is a difference in the eastern and western philosophy towards life. The eastern philosophy focuses on duty, following the path of dharma, doing the right thing, where as the western philosophy focuses on the self and what makes you happy. The children who are born here of parents who follow the eastern philosophy seem to have a handle on how to make it work - a good blend of eastern and western and they still seem to do just fine.

And those of us who were born and brought up outside the US thought we had it tough!!! I guess some things you can learn from your kids.

So what do you say to those outliers who are later bloomers?

Be happy, don't get angry, have the courage of conviction and whatever happens right now it is because it is good for you.

Entreprenurial spirit

Sometimes you have to be pushed to the wall before you decide enough is enough and decide to work for yourself rather than work for someone else. Sometimes you are just born with that independent streak and sometimes it does not matter what - you will always end up working for someone else.

I have seen it with myself and those around me in this economy, with my parents and those in their generation and among the young generation as well. The security of a job while working for someone else includes a regular paycheck and health insurance along with 2 weeks vacation a year. But didn't that bubble burst a few months ago when the entire economy tanked and the term job security became obsolete? So now what?

Necessity is the mother of invention. I truly believe that this recession has made entrepreneurs out of all of us. We are looking for ways to cater to a need, Obama is doing his bit by making it easier on taxes and affordable health care - right now at least, of course the banks are holding on to their money - so you are forced to do something where you don't need the bank.

In this day and age, where the Internet has opened up to a million different avenues to meet the demand of the consumer - the opportunities are endless. What separates an entrepreneur from someone who is not is the taking of risk and the absolute faith one has in his plan. There is no fear of failure. There is no fear. Period. Of course they dream big.

And for those who will never start something on their own - I guess they won't need to if they are needed in whatever capacity they are are in now. They are meeting some one's demand.

Once the entrepreneur bug bites,it never really goes away.

Make it happen!

There is something to Vision boards. I have been hearing it about it for a while now but never really put it into practice. But you may have noticed that once you are conscious of something, you see it all around you - be it in conversations, on the web, books or even hear people talking about it.

Writing down your goal or vision also has some power to it. Actually that is the first step to making anything happen. I noticed that once I started writing what I want from life - things around me began to materialize. Now it was a question of picking up and running with it.

But then there is the thought in my head that says that I should not, it is too fast, what if etc etc. You will see that the major difference between the people who are successful entrepreneurs and those who are not is the speed and conviction that they proceed with. Fear does not hold them back. They do not worry about what other people have to say about what they can and cannot accomplish.

Therein lies the difference. My teenager was upset cause she did not understand why everyone tells her she cannot make it to her dream college. Not that they have anything against her, they are just telling her what they have heard based on the facts.

If you really want something - go for it without letting anything else get in the way - focus on it and live and breathe it - write it down and put it where you will see it all the time and then it becomes a part of your sub conscious, imagine what it would be like to accomplish it, dream about it and you can be rest assured that not even God will get in the way.

Courage

I remember hearing somewhere that being courageous is doing something really dangerous without thinking about the consequences.

So I guess if you have to think about the repercussions of every single action - then you are a scared cat or just very cautious.

I am the only one who seems to be doing things in a way that nobody else does. My better half has no qualms in telling me that I never seem to follow the norm. I guess following the norm guarantees success in the way you do things because you can always see a pattern.

But what do you do if you march to the beat of a different drummer? People seem to see you as an anomaly. I guess I have always been that way - different from everyone. It is easier to keep quiet since nobody gets what you say anyway - but the world operates a different way. They seem to thrive on those who make the most noise or make the most money or make the biggest fool of everyone.

So what do you do - whatever you have always done. Think about what you want to do, focus on the positive and just keep going.

Week 2 - Day 10

Well if 3 miles was hard - 2 mile should be easy.
Ha! Tell that to someone who does not hurt.

I think it has something to do with the mindset. if you have to run 5 miles - the first and last mile is the hardest. But when you have to run two miles - the first and the last mile is hard - so that probably explains it.

My feet hurt - actually everything hurt but the bottom of my feet really hurt. The shoes probably has something to do with it. My physical therapist has threatened to steal them from my foot and throw them away - but I am hanging on to them.

Talking about shoes, little did I know that there are overpronators and supinators - it basically means how do you distribute your weight and land when you run - whether the arch collapses and turns inward when you run or if you are too rigid.

Based on how you run - you find shoes built to give you the comfort where you need it. Either the sole will curved, straight or semi curved. Now just to find the right kind of shoes.

Secret to Success

I think I found the secret to success. For some it may sound like common sense, for others it may sound like hooey but I think it is true and it works.

I was talking to my sister and talking about keeping rooms clean. Considering my daughter is very much like her aunt - she sympathizes with my daughter a lot. But what she said made total sense.

I am sure you have heard about how you keep your desk is a reflection of your state of mind. Some may agree and some may not - cause I know very senior people who have nothing on their desk because all the information is in their head. I am sure you have heard your mom tell you to make your bed - because making your bed makes the rest of your room look clean. However the secret to success is (drum roll please, ta da da da) keeping your bathroom clean.

Okay I can hear some of you laughing but think about it -if the place you go to keep yourself clean is dirty - then how clean are you anyway? Considering most people are obsessed about how clean the restrooms are and you actually get more germs from your kitchen sink than the bathroom - it should not be a surprise.

So anyway - I told my daughter this and I made sure my bathroom is spotless and things are definitely looking up. Try it and let me know if it has made a difference in your life.

Week 2 - Day 8, Day 9

Day 8 was stretch and strengthen. That was easy (so I thought) but I was sore. That is a good thing - it means that your muscles are working and building.

Day 9 was a 3 mile run. I did 4 miles 2 days ago so 3 should be a piece of cake - that is what I said. I decided to go to the gym and run - just so I had some numbers to work with. The hardest part was keeping the motivation so that you don't stop. If I had to do 10 minute miles - I would be going at 6miles/hour - way too fast. If I had to 12 minute miles - I would be going at 5 miles per hour and 15 minute miles would be at 4 miles an hour.

The bad thing about numbers is that you end up calculating it all the time. You become so obsessed with it. I was counting paces and realized that for .1 mile I had 20 or 22 paces depending on my speed.

It does not matter if you are outside or inside - it is your motivation that keeps you going.

Day 7 - long run

Today was the day of the long run - 4 miles - Happy Mother's Day. I think that was the best gift - gift of time to let me run. Now if that was planned or not - I am not sure, but it worked for me.

The run was not bad - I started off walking and gradually started running - walked fast when it got hard. i think the hardest part of running alone is allowing yourself not to get bored.

I like running with a buddy. It helps in the passage of time and before you know it the run is over. Stretching of course is important. More important to do it after than before.

Now to figure out how long am I taking to do this.

Day 6

The schedule said cross train - but being the weekend - I could only do stretching and some dancing of course. If I sweat I know I worked out - usually I don't
break into a sweat. Maybe I never worked that hard before?

As I get ready for the long run on Sunday - I had to find out about speed training. So I asked the question:

Q: I am training for the half marathon. So for the entire 13.1 mile should I be able to maintain a conversation and not be out of breath and that is what the speed training is for?

A:Speed training gets you out of the rut of running a set speed all the time. A lot of people who jog will only jog at one speed .. no matter how long they've been doing it. It is comfortable to them and they don't want to change.

Speed training will teach your body to recover and encourage you to run faster. You probably won't do any speed training until you can consistently run long distances. Say you can run 6 miles in an hour on a consistent basis.Speed training will encourage you from running a 10 minute mile to a 9 minute mile to less (with more practice) .. so you'll get faster

Day 5

Its a good thing the schedule says cross train - cause that is what I need. I never realized that running only works a certain set of muscles. In order to gain stamina you have to be able to breathe correctly and work the rest of your body.

Dancing is all about conserving energy and learning to use that store of energy when needed. So day 5 was all about dancing. It felt good.

A way to a man's heart ....

..is through his stomach. I never really believed it - but it is true.

We are a group of moms who get together often (too often according to our husbands) and we talk about everything under the sun.

As a child when I encountered a group of moms get together, the discussion always centered around food. For the longest time I always wondered why that was. Now that I am in that group of moms - our discussions are always centered around food.

I think these discussions have certainly have been more fun than any counseling or therapy session as I try to figure out what is it about men that make them happy. O there definitely are a couple things- but food is number one.

The day the food is prepared, tasty and served - o boy the mood is definitely good - for everyone. And when it is not - all hell breaks loose. I never thought about that pattern - but as I paid more attention to it - I did see it.

So a good way to make a man mellow - serve him good food. How you serve it - I will leave it up to you. :)

Day 4 - will your thighs get bigger?

Guilt - that horrible parasite that eats you up inside when you don't do something. That is what I felt when I took a day of rest from running a day sooner than planned.

I know I should not let it bother me but it did. So I did 3 miles - which was not bad but I was sore - which was good. That meant I was working them.

So it brought me to another question - which I am sure other women runners have -

Q: If you run slow will your thighs get bigger?

Ans: The speed at which you run has nothing to do with the size of the muscles in your leg. Leg size is more genetic, some people are just born with bigger legs. You can increase muscle mass by weight training. Jogging will generally build muscles to a certain extent, but the speed at which you jog is unrelated to leg size.

The speed at which you jog more determines your cardiovascular shape, i.e if you are able to run further at a faster pace, your heart rate will be elevated more, leading to a better workout in general than jogging at a slower pace. However, for distance running, once you establish a base, you should be able to run at a pace which allows you to comfortably maintain a conversation and not be out of breath.

But one thing that is good for training is speed training, where you run a distance(100 yards) at a fast pace, then return to your normal pace for a distance(300 yards) to recover your> breath/heart-rate. This helps build up your speed of running .. as you do this once a week, you'll find that you can go further faster before you need to slow down to recover.

Superwoman syndrome

Why didn't someone tell me that I had to do it all? Is it just my expectation or what the world expects of me?

As a woman you look after your children, husband, pet, house, cook and clean. You are also the Jill of all trades along with being the pillar of strength. You also have to drive the kids around to various activities and be in a wonderful mood all the time along with looking gorgeous and taking time for yourself. O I forgot I had to work too. You forgot to mention sleep. O that too in between all the others stuff from the list above.

I think as a woman - we carry a lot of guilt. And those who judge us - are women themselves.

So what do I say to that? Forget the guilt - do what you have to do to be happy and keep the peace.

If you have a problem with that - I think that is something you have to deal with.

Day 3 - Will you put on weight if you stop running?

It was a rest day! Not planned but it happened anyway. As a dancer, the biggest fear is putting on weight if you stop dancing. I had questions in my mind about the results of certain techniques and I asked a dear friend who explained it beautifully.

Q:If you stop running will you put on weight?

Ans: Not necessarily - depends on the amount of food you eat, etc.The reason people lose weight when running is that running uses a lot of energy by the body to run.
So by jogging regularly, people usually exert more energy by running then they consume by eating, which leads to weight loss. Also, once you establish yourself in good physical condition, your body at rest will burn more energy then someone who isn't in good physical condition.
So to answer your question, NO. If you stop jogging, your body will simply return slowly to the current state that you are in right now.

What am I worth?

I am not talking in terms of money. I am talking about what value am I contributing to society. Does my word mean anything?

When you are young, you are taught the basic courtesies - you know say please and thank you, if you make a promise don't break it, if you give them your word, then keep it, take care of others and their properties like you do your own, be considerate of others, return calls immediately.

But the more I look around I find that that is disappearing. Or maybe I have not seen it in a while cause I am always correcting my kids on the list mentioned above.

What I have found is that it does not matter where you are from, what school you went to or how much money you make - in the end you are judged by your character and if you keep your word.

If you don't keep your word - nobody will say anything the first time, but after that nobody will expect anything from you. Period.

Stay courageous

I know my child is getting bullied at school. I am definitley going to throw a fit about it and make sure it is nipped in the bud.

As a parent, it is hard to sit back and watch. What is even harder is knowing how he fells cause you went through the same thing yourself. How do you make him come out stronger even though he is not the athletic type? How do you make him get out of situations, when you cannot be there to protect him.

My child is a black belt, but a bully does not understand restraint, only power.

Strength is in making the right decision.
It takes courage to know when to stop.
It takes courage to report a bully before it gets really bad.

Day 2

What a beautiful day! It was ideal to go cycling. The schedule said 2 miles or cross training so we ended up biking for 2 miles or more I think - we were too busy admiring all the spring gardens and flowers.

Interesting discussion came up about maintaining tight abs. Crunches are supposed to be good for abs, but how you do them also makes a difference. We are all post baby and need to make sure we are doing it right.

I am sure we will find out - depending on where it hurts.

A Simple Courtesy

It does not take much but it makes a huge difference. There was a going away party for a 6th grader. My son decided not to go because he had another birthday to go to.
Mistake number one.

I went for the going away party cause I wanted to say farewell. Some kids came, some came later because of other commitments. Another friend also had gone to the same birthday party and still came to the farewell. My son definitely could have gotten a ride. So I asked the mom who brought her son from the party to the farewell - and she said my son declined - Mistake number two.

I called and asked my husband if he could go and pick him and bring him - he declined.

By this time I was furious. When my son arrived home - he came up to me saying - I know I am going to get yelled at. O yes he was most definitely going to get yelled at.

Being part of a social group is so important for preteens but I think even more important is being part of the popular social group. And that is what happenned in this case.

What he had to realize is that small courtesis like stopping by and saying bye even when you have other things to do reflects on you as a person and how you value relationships. It may be a simple thing but it goes a long way.

So the next time he has to make a decision, he has to put himself in the other person's shoes and see if that is the right decision.

Hope he remembers the next time he has conflicting social events.

Law of Coincidence

Is there such a thing as coincidence? Actually there is not.
If you feel that way - it is actually the universe answering your question.

For example - in my previous post I had written about the conversation in my mind.

I have been staring at Steve Pavalina's post for a time now that is on my blogroll but never got around to reading it - but then after I finished writing my post - I meandered through the post.

It answered my question. Truly it did. He even said if you say I don't know - he would slap you. I don't know of anything else that would get you a better reaction.

So what else did he say? Pretty much what most focus driven people would say - don't whine, don't be weak, don't be a coward, don't argue, don't ask permission and don't blame.

I loved the don't ask permission part.

You can read more about it here!

Training - Day 1

It was a good day to start and the weather was awesome. For a change no rain.
My buddy and I were able to complete 3 miles running.

I did follow the advice that said take it easy and start by stretching, walk the first five minutes and then do a slow run. Right now the emphasis is not on time but on being able to complete the distance.

Must have taken 45 minutes - considering we were holding a conversation the entire time, we did not even realize the passage of time.

Stretched after we were done too.

Now tomorrow - cross training.

Half Marathon - here we come

I have started on my new goal - training for the half marathon.
I got the website, got the books, got the plan.
Now to get the shoes and start pounding pavement.

Well, if you wait for the shoes - the running will never happen - so the running will happen even with the old shoes.

Interesting to note that since I made mention of the half marathon - I had a few friends say they want to run too. So now I have to make sure that I plan the schedule so that we can do the required miles and give us enough time to stretch and strengthen.

I am using Hal Higdon's training for novice runners. I also have a book that has been designed for women runners.

So check back to see how we progress.

A conversation in my head

How do you know which way to go?

If you are in a car and you stop - somebody behind you will honk that will force you to go in a particular direction.

So how do you know if it is the right direction?
Unless you already know the way - you really don't.

So, in life when you come to a fork - what do you do?
You make a decision which way to go.

So, what if you make the wrong decision?
Well, you never know until you make the decision.

So what is holding me back?
Maybe it is fear.

Fear of what?
Fear of failing, people saying stuff, to me about me.

You cannot stop people from saying stuff. So what you gonna do?
Nothing, just make a decision and go with it.

Good, so what are you waiting for?
GO!
OK I am going.

Reverse! Reverse!

When you were young your parents told you study hard, become good at what you do and then you will be known for your work and then people will respect you for that.

But now that does not apply. There is no reason that says that you have to be old by the time you get that knowledge. The same goes on the Internet. With the Internet making knowledge available at your fingertips - it is the passion that you have and expertise that you acquire that gives you respect.

You gain the respect first on the Internet because you make your self known first.
Only then you get power - the money comes last.

I can only say that it is a good thing - at least I don't have to wait until I am retired to get any respect or expertise.

Who thought..

..you would be competing against your own? I was at a party where most of the parents had kids who were college bound in less than 2 years. As discussions started leading towards college tours and how do you figure out what college you need to go to, the topic came to quotas.

A statement was made that everythng was a quota. After all if you gave the admissions only to the kids who had it all, you would have only Asians for the most part in the top ten colleges.

Why you ask? Ask any Indian parent. They will do anything for their children's education. However what most parents don't realize is that as you get your kids to be really good academically, in community services, extra curricular and leadership, that is what every other kid's parent is also doing. As a result what do you have - a pool of Indian kids who are so bright that they are all competing against each other for the top 10 school sin the country.

So what does that mean? It means that if you are a Asian Indian boy - you have very little or no chance of getting into an ivy league school because you are competing with every other indian kid in the country. Quite a crapshoot, isn't it?

So what do you do? You still study really hard - but when you go to undergrad, maybe look at the top 10 schools as a goal for grad school.

But then everything depends on luck.