Saturday, May 23, 2009

Permission

It must be a control thing. Asking for permission and granting it. I know as a child you have to ask permission for everything. Not that you will be granted permission but it is good manners to ask. As you grow older - it is almost like second nature - where you ask permission but you don't expect to be denied permission - it is just courtesy.

Then you grow up (or if you read my last post - you age chronologically) and other people ask your permission. And it feels great. Wow! The power you have over some one else's decision making.

But herein lies the issue - when someone asks you what to do and you give an answer - you expect them to do as you say. That does not always happen. Sometimes they ask you because they want to know what you think. If you expect them to do as you tell them, then you are foolish.

But there is another aspect to asking permission. When you ask someone else's permission to want what you want you are giving away power. You cannot decide on a choice based on someone else's decision. It took me a long time to figure that one out. You make a decision and stick with it. Sure you can ask people, and they will tell you if they are for or against it, but that does not mean they are giving their permission.

You cannot get someone else's permission to justify what you want to do and then complain when things don't go your way. Asking permission to want what you want is an act of cowardice - which means you are not willing to take ownership of the consequences of your actions.

It is about the courage of conviction because even if the going gets tough - the tough keep going.

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